After being in a relationship for almost five years, my wife and I were blessed to unite ourselves in the sacrament of marriage last October. We both met through our parish and grew spiritually together. On our honeymoon and only two weeks into our marriage, we were blessed to find out that my wife Wendy was pregnant. We weren’t quite sure how to take it and it only took three pregnancy tests and one doctor to convince Wendy that she really was pregnant.
We decided not to tell anyone until we arrived back in Sydney and as you can imagine everyone was so happy for us. We became really attached to our baby. We had names ready, a little first baby outfit and already began praying for our little blessing.
Eight weeks into the pregnancy we had our first ultrasound. Wendy was lying down while the lady carried out the ultrasound. I could feel that something was wrong as she thoroughly kept looking. She said that she can’t find anything and we would have to talk to the doctor about it. Walking out I just had that sick feeling in my stomach.
After talking to the doctor, he said “that it could be a miscarriage but we wouldn’t know for sure until we do a blood test tomorrow”.
After we walked out Wendy started crying and said, “what if the baby is gone”? We were both guttered but didn’t lose hope. When we said our prayers that night, we said’ “Lord we don’t want anything but only what you want” and we prayed the prayer of Job, “Naked I came from my mothers womb and naked I shall return. The Lord gives and the Lord takes away, blessed be the name of the Lord”. The next day we would learn that Wendy lost the baby and as hard as it was God gave us the grace to accept His will. We never lost hope or blamed Him but just trusted that He knows best.
Six months on and thanks be to God we are now again expecting a baby. Last week we again had the first ultrasound. We were both so nervous and terrified at the same time. Wendy was prepared for the worst. My morning prayer that day was again the prayer of Job, “Naked I came from my mothers womb and naked I shall return. The Lord gives and the Lord takes away, blessed be the name of the Lord.” I can stand here and tell you that God gives far more the He takes because at that ultrasound we were blessed to see not one but two healthy hearts beating and we are now expecting twins.
My friends, don’t ever lose hope. In the six months between the pregnancies, I continued my theology degree, we bought a house, started our own business and renovated. God always gives abundantly and only wills our good.
Miscarriage affects many, yet it is often not spoken about. If you are struggling emotionally after a miscarriage, see you health professional or priest for a referral. It is not uncommon to experience grief.
For those in Australia you can also contact MaroniteCare which is the welfare arm of Maronite Church in Australia.
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